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I DID NOT smell THEstinker's swim diaper after his (10 minute) swim lesson to see if it smelled like pee or if it could be dried out and used for the next day's lesson. That would be gross!
I DID NOT let my kids stay at a family party until 10:00 PM!!!! If you know me, you know I would never do this because a regular bed time is important!
I DID NOT go through the drive-through at McDonald's and not order myself anything because I am trying to lose weight and then proceed to finish off what they didn't eat of their happy meals!
I DID NOT go to the party store to buy a specific costume, Venom, the black costume since he already has the red one, for SPIDERman and come home with 3 costumes instead. And I most certainly DID NOT justify buying the extra 2 by claiming that I cannot ever find dress-up clothes for boys, only girls, and the ninja was only $5!
And said Venom costume did not put body-builder muscles on my 4 year-old!
My husband DID NOT tease me by holding a frog in my face and saying "Say hi to your friend" and I DID NOT scream at the top of my lungs and probably scare the neighbors. Not me. And I was not still laughing at myself 10 minutes later and SPIDERman did not ask me so adorably "Mommy, are you still laughing at yourself?"
I AM NOT supposed to be in bed right now instead of on the computer and I DID NOT thoroughly enjoy creating my first NOT ME post!